It’s rain on the bonnet . . .

Overheating_color_hr_2 I’d travelled through torrential rain from Gloucestershire to Slough when, suddenly, it stopped.  Mind blowingly exciting for you, not.  Relevant?  Most certainly!  I was a girl on a mission and The Smoke (more later) beckoned.  Hit Hammersmith just as the traffic was squeezing itself into the arteries of London.  OK, no problem, radio on, singing along at dangerously high decibels.  (At the moment am slightly deaf in one ear so tone and quality of sound not guaranteed.)  Crawled through Fulham but, no sweat, enjoyed watching the market stallholders unpacking their goodies.  (How on earth do they make a living when 9 out of 10 stallholders sell fruit and veg?)  Traffic was moving, slowly.  Gave ‘Delilah’ some wellie and generally felt good despite dragging myself from my bed before 5.00am.  Noticed how double carburettor of flash car in front was smoking a bit.  Decided he’s just got up and started up his status symbol.  He turned off.  Proceeded at the pace of a rain forest sloth.  Noted how many drivers lived locally because of smoking exhausts, obviously just started up their cars . . .

Then the adrenalin rush started!  Realised all the ‘smoke’ was in fact coming from under MY bonnet, not rising into view from the underbelly of the car in front.  Oh gawd!  Temperature gauge OK.  No red lights displayed so therefore it’s not happening.  Inch forward.  No smoke.  Yep, I was right, no cause for concern.  Notice pedestrians looking under my car.  Pretend I don’t.  Enthusiasm for cheesy favourites on radio evaporating with the steam.  Remember hearing once that if the engine is overheating, put on the heater and fan at full pelt.  Did that.  Adrenalin rush + heater = human overheating.  (Do we grow to match our cars as well as our pets?)  Need Maltesers, don’t have any.  I do find one placed strategically under the tongue so calming, don’t you?  Wish traffic would move along.  What’s the matter with them all?  Be still my beating heart (well, not completely, but you know what I mean).  All will be well.  Hit a flowing bit and feel the G-Force as I top 20mph but acceleration short lived.  Stopped.  Steaming.  Ring husband.  (Note to Police:  Have paid my speeding fine and parking ticket.  This is an emergency.  Please don’t arrest me retrospectively!)  Husband says it’s rain evaporating from bonnet.  Duh.  It hasn’t been raining for at least 50 miles!  Inform him.  Relatively pleasantly.  Tells me it’s just because I’m in slow moving traffic.  Rad Weld will hold.  Perhaps I should leave car and find nearest Tube station, he suggests.  Glad he’s not near or there would be cause for arrest.  Limp to destination . . . SatNav said I was near destination.  Miss turning.  Steam rising.  Becoming vocal to other drivers hindering my progress.  Not good.  Can’t they recognise this emergency?  Need to keep moving.  Go round block (feels like 30 miles but is about 300 yards).  Park – thankful for space.  Switch off.  Steam rushes from under bonnet in celebratory crescendo. 

Husband rings.  Tell him I have arrived.  Am informed there is 1.5 litres of water in boot to top up radiator when cool.  Perhaps I’d like to lift bonnet so engine cools more easily and wait for half an hour to top up?  No, shan’t.  (Recognise childlike truculence.  Don’t care.)  Informed I should be OK on homeward journey as long as I get past Slough by 5.00pm and keep moving.  No pressure there, then!  No pressure in engine either but will worry about that later, I’m off to enjoy my day . . .

 

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